Advent and Divorce

I'm a child of divorce. I'm also a pastor who regularly sees it and its impact on people. I've noticed a few things about divorce at Christmas and have been told a few others. Here's an incomplete list of observations:

1) Divorce is a powerful invalidator. "You failed at the most important relationship you had on earth." I've spoken with several divorced people about their struggle to not feel accused like this by the rest of us in churches. At Christmas, some say, it's worse. Depending on how fresh the wounds of divorce are, non-divorced people would do well to remember that any line they draw between themselves and the divorced is felt much more heavily by the divorced person. One person told me that church is like a monumental reminder "that I don't belong anymore." People of Christ's gospel have no business communicating the same thing Satan does to people. He is the accuser. We don't need to do his job for him. Actually, we need to stop him from doing his job so well in our midst. When we say or hear, "God hates divorce," let's make sure we're not saying or hearing, "God hates you."

2) Divorce is a reminder of reality. We're all broken. Christ was born into a fallen world. He came to heal the sick. Advent isn't a sign that things have gone well on planet Earth. It's a sign that, without God's help in the form of His Son as our Savior, we're really sunk. Faith in Christ doesn't erase our brokenness, it redeems us in spite of it. The Father didn't send Him to show us how to fix ourselves; He sent Him to become broken for us. Unless we are honest and aware of how broken we are, we are blind and deaf to the grace of God in the gospel of Christ.

3) "Divorced" as an identity fades in the light of Christ's Advent. No one wants a permanent label based on his or her struggles or failures in life, unless he or she overcame them. And even then, it's not for everyone. Christ is all about overcoming. Whatever happened to us in life is overshadowed by what happened that first Christmas and first Easter. Whoever we're trying to be mature enough not to blame for all our problems and pain is upstaged by the King of Kings. However we ended up in whatever mess we find ourselves in is only a distraction compared to the eternal plan of God for our salvation in Christ. "Christian" is your identity now. Don't forget it. Don't let others forget it.

PRAYER: Lord, thank You for being with me in life. I pray for all my broken relationships and I pray for those who are struggling with theirs. I know that it's not enough to say that You have a plan for my life. You ARE the plan for my life. As the song says, "God bless the broken road that led me to You." Whoever else is in my life, You ARE my life. Whoever else I love, I love You, Jesus.

TOMORROW: Advent and Suicide

Advent and Cancer

One struggle that many people share is cancer. The "c" word, some call it. All tell me they can remember the first time they heard it from a doctor's lips. To hear "you have cancer" really means "cancer has you," unless you determine in the depth of your being that it will be otherwise. Beating cancer is an inspiring thing to see. Even some who have died from it, as I watched them live despite it, fall into the category of cancer survivor in my eyes. Cancer came to rob them and left empty handed. The ones I know who beat cancer did it via their faith. The message of the angels is one they took to heart. In Luke 1 and 2 you can read the message of the angels to both Mary and the shepherds. "Fear not," they said. That's the key. Fear is the real cancer.

Advent is a fear killer. Advent means arrival. We are not merely to celebrate the arrival of Christ in history, but the arrival of Christ in our own stories. Advent is meaningless unless we each experience our own personal advent, ending with new birth. The Advent of Christ is a relentlessly life-giving event. It surges with hope and blinds the darkness of despair with light.

PRAYER: Father, I place gently before You every person I know and every person reading this who is fighting cancer. Heal them today and restore fullness of life to them in every way, in Jesus' Name I pray. Especially obliterate fear and any hold it has on them or their loved ones. In each case, let Advent become a game-changer, a transforming blessing, a new reality, and a direct experience of Your power. Thank You for Your compassion and strength. Amen.

TOMORROW: Advent and Divorce

Time and time again

Here we are again. It's another Advent. We could say this same thing about any repeated passing of time. It's another month, another week, another day. All these observations are true. There are 168 hours in a week. It's time. It's the one thing we're always losing track of. It's the one thing we're always losing. It's flying by. Advent reminds us that we are to adjust our perspective about the passing of time. Instead of seeing it as just passing by (or racing by), we are to see it as heading toward something. Every movie and book has an ending. So does time itself. Picture it. Every plane in the sky; every car on every road; every train, boat, or rocket - all are heading to the final end: Jesus Christ. He's the point of all time. There are 771 references to time that I could find in the NIV version of the Holy Bible. The first, interestingly, occurs after the fall and features a person in Scripture who represents the worst of every one of us: Cain. (Genesis 4:3 - In the course of time Cain brought some of the fruits of the soil as an offering to the LORD.) The last occurs near the very end of the Bible and reminds us of what we shouldn't need reminding of: we're running out of time. (Revelation 22:10 - Then he told me, “Do not seal up the words of the prophecy of this book, because the time is near.)

The feeling of time draining away from us is offset dramatically by the Advent of Jesus Christ. Suddenly He comes, and with His gospel He changes the nature of even death itself. He makes it a doorway to eternal life. The fear and rejection that death assumes vanishes for every person who really understands those Christmas carols and those verses from Luke 2 that are read at every year's end.

PRAYER: Jesus, you are my comfort, my inspiration, the thing I'm most interested in today. The sun and wind remind me of You. Eyes looking back at me in the mirror have a familiar look of eyes searching always for You in every person, situation, and moment. Your Advent moves me to tears and reminds me that I am alive again in You and alive forever in You. I don't deserve it. I never have. Thank You, King Jesus. This time, this Advent, make the time You give me count for You more than ever.

TOMORROW: Advent and Cancer

The Advent of Advent 2010

Our celebration of the arrival of Christ is arriving soon! This is our new devotional blog for this year's Advent at Goodwill Evangelical Presbyterian Church in Montgomery, NY. Daily entries will begin on Sunday, November 28, 2010, the first day of Advent and will continue through Christmas Eve Day.